August 8, 2018

TAKE A RISK


Just a few days ago I was listening to a podcast featuring Necole Kane, celebrity gossip blogger turned woman’s empowerment advocate. She got me thinking, a lot, about my mission on this Earth. Where I am as opposed to where I want to be. The impact I want to leave behind. You know all those things that you start thinking about when your thirtieth birthday is quickly approaching. Am I proud of the things I have accomplished thus far, absolutely but do I think I am firing at all cylinders, absolutely not.  I had heard Necole’s story prior to coming on this podcast; she left successfully career behind at it’s height to to start a new more fulfilling one. To take such a risk not knowing if it would pay off is beyond anything I could imagine doing myself. She made a decision, to live a full life was more valuable then how much money was in the bank. Taking risks is way beyond my character. I live for comfort and certainty. I go to work everyday, I know that on Friday I am going to get a check for X amount of dollars, and all my bills will be paid. I have lived with this certainty for 29 years. My junior year of college was the first time I realized that mediocrity was not for me. I was acing my courses but knew that what I was studying was not going to sustain/fulfill me. Like every other person that dares to try fashion, it was calling me. So I got my degree and swore I would pursue the burning desire in my heart to create freely. Each year since I have made promise after promise. Next year I will do it. But each year I found a new excuse. This must be paid, parents must approve, savings this much, what about this guy. It was never the right time. Eight years later I am still living in my hometown in a career that doesn’t align with my passion or talents. After having a major low point on my 29th birthday I had a huge decision to make. Did I want to be in the same place doing the same thing this time next year? Or do I want to risk it all for something that will be hard but more fulfilling and rewarding. Comfort or growth? Two months into this year I was still in a lull and by spring I knew I couldn’t continue to live this way anymore. So I chose. I would rather struggle for a dream than live in comfort doing something I know isn’t meant for me. Now peep this, there is a lesson in everything that we go thru in life. These last eight years were not wasted. I was certainly planted in each of my roles for a purpose. My time in this current role has prepared me to be the woman I need to be in order to step into this next journey. 

The big take aways from this interview:
  • Comfort does not produce progress 
  • You must be your biggest cheerleading, stop expecting others to believe in you
  • “What if I try and succeed” has to ring truer than “What if I try and fail”
  • Rejection is a blessing

As I have buckled down and spent the last 5 months saving and planning I have also spent a lot of time in my head with “what ifs”, what if this doesn’t work and I look stupid, but who really cares. Try, fail, try again! Repeat. That’s it. Every expert started at day one just like you, just like me. Also and this is important, you have to know who to allow pour into you. Its so critical. A lot of people are not going to understand why you need to do this. They are going to be practical. Give you practical reason why you should not embark on this journey. Most will shower you with their own insecurities - especially friends who don’t have the courage to take control of their own life. All sorts of negative vibes are going to flow your way. Do not let this discourage you. They mean well, but practical advice isn’t for you. Really take time to evaluate who you are going to share this journey with BEFORE you spread the word. Out of handful of people I shared my news with, only 2 or 3 were like YES, do it. Which is why I say you have to be your own greatest cheerleader! You know what you can do and the effort you are willing to put forth for your dream! You know what is in your heart. So once you decide, just go for it! Fear is for suckers! The journey awaits!


March 7, 2018

WHEN WALKING IN YOUR PURPOSE FEELS IMPOSSIBLE



When you struggle with anxiety and low lows it is so important to stay on task and develop a routine that works for you. For me that routine is taking time in the morning to meditate and read scripture, pray, workout and write. I spent Christmas in Mexico, turned 29, had a minor break down and never really got back to the routine that kept me balanced once I returned home. It's been two months and I have spent more time feeling sorry for myself than I tackling the intentions I set for myself this year. I don't know what changed but this morning I said no more, I got out of bed when my alarm went off (instead of hitting snooze 4 times), did a quick meditation and the Lord led me to 2 Thessalonians 3:6-10 which says "If a man will not work he shall not eat" well I have a full-time job but it was the break down that touched me, "There is a difference between leisure and laziness. Relaxation and recreation provide a much needed balance to our lives. As Christians when it is time to work we must jump in. We should make the most of our talent and time, doing all we can to provide for ourselves and our dependents. Rest when you should be resting and work when you should be working". Although I do work a full-time job I know that I am not making the most of my talents or time. It almost feels impossible to chase after a dream when you have full-time job but it is definitely possible only if your up for the challenge and willing. You give someone else's dream 40 hrs a week, so you can at least give yours an hour a day. So to all the ladies out there who dream bigger than 9-5, this prayer is mine but yours:

Lord, I thank you for nudging me out of bed this morning. Today's scripture was right on time. You know the things I am struggling with. I know that you did not put me on this Earth to be mediocre but to spread my wings and make use of the gifts and talents that you have given me. I am a phenomenal writer. I know how to uplift others to see the best in themselves and believe in what they have to offer the world. As I use this gift to support others I pray that you will teach me how to lavish myself with love, support, and encouragement. Break this depressed spirit that rests upon me day in and out. Break the chains of laziness, unworthiness, anxiety and doubt in me. Let this be a new day. Day 1. When I begin to compare myself to others remind me that I don't have to have a huge following in order to do your will or make an impact. Teach me how to make better use of my time. That I will stop wasting it behind the television but instead use it to better my craft. I trust you with my talent. I trust that if I am diligent in sharing it that you will yield the results...but in your perfect timing. If I am meant to do this full-time it will be. If I put in the work. Lord I pray that as I put forth my best effort that you will continue to remind me that I am doing your will...what you have called of me. That I will not get caught up comparing my journey to others. I am right where you would have me to be. My journey is my journey and only I can fulfill your purpose for my life.  


December 13, 2017

DEC 13TH

Hat: BP \ Sunnies: Quay \ Top: H&M \ Bottoms: Forever21 \ Jacket: Zara kids

December 6, 2017

LESSONS

Frames: Quay |  Sweater, Pants, Bag: Zara


This weekend I sat down with a friend that I pretty much grew up. I love getting together with individuals who knew me way back when. We can laugh about the stupidity of our youth and celebrate the growth. This individual has known me longer than anyone, besides family of course. We met when we were 17 years old. Our early years were not pretty. But we were kids and kids do dumb things, that we look back on as adults and just laugh. We took a couple years off here and there but we have always been there for each other during the worst; break ups, loosing a parent, sucky jobs, etc. During our meet up this friend who has seen me through a lot told me that he saw a happiness in me that he has never seen before. What a confirmation from God that all the things that tried me this year were on purpose for a purpose! There is a new glow about me. Hallelujah!! We tend to put emphasis on the wrong things. We tend to worry about the wrong things. A huge wake up for me this year was putting everything into perspective. The things that I cried over or worried about 10 years ago, or even 5 years ago don't even matter to me now. So whenever I am experiencing something I "think" I can't bare I bring it into perspective, "Will this even matter in 5 years?" and usually the answer is no. Only a handful of people know that back in April I lost someone who held a significant space in my heart. I was devastated. Ready to give up on myself, on life, on progress. I pretty much held up in bed, cried everywhere no one was looking, felt like I was dying (told you I'm dramatic) for like three months until God stepped in. The moment I redirected my pain into passion things started to look up. Does this individual still hold a place in my heart? Of course. Do I realize that he served his purpose in my life and vice versa and it was time for us to both move on and grow apart? Absolutely! Little by little, day by day I moved on and stopped wallowing in the hurt of it all. I accepted that God used me to hold him up during the toughest year of his life & God used him to draw me back to Him, my purpose and myself. So one thing I know to be true is that God will never remove you from a situation to put you in one less than. He is faithful. So 7 months later I am thriving and so is he. In two short weeks I turn 29 and I can truly say that I lived this year on purpose. At last my 20's are coming to an end and I plan to lay a foundation for continued growth. As for anything this next year tries to throw at me, I got over this mountain so bring it on. I am ready to create, learn myself, treat myself, step into the spotlight, go places, nourish my friendships and just do more of what I love. So here are some of the lessons that truly enriched my life:

Forgive - do not allow bitterness to store in your heart for those who mistreat you Accept what you cannot control - let it go Set time aside for yourself - get to know yourself, what do you like? what don't you like? when are you the happiest? go on a solo date. read a book. cook dinner. take a yoga class.  Speak up - your opinions/feelings matter.  Don't chase - the people who are truly meant for you will make the time.  You can't expect others to love you when you don't - self love is the most rewarding gift you can give yourself. truly what you you believe about yourself on the inside will exude on the outside. people can tell when your reaching for love as validation or worth. it's not attractive. and no man can validate you like Jesus can The love you want is inside of you - do you want to spend the rest of your life with yourself? then why should he? Be patient - wait on God. His timing is perfect Don't sacrifice yourself to be perfect for others - no one is perfect. those who love you won't hold your flaws against you. Stop trying to hold open doors that God closed on purpose - that relationship, friendship, job, etc that He knows may seem good but isn't His best!  Rejection is protection - God allowed that person that takes but doesn't replenish to walk out of your life. God blocked you from getting that job that's going to steal your peace and keep you from pursuing your true destiny. God removed that friend that sucks the life and brings out the worst in you. He out here trying to help you dodge a bullet and you steady fighting it. Stop it. He has better for you if you just wait Your past is not an indication of your future - there is always a teachable moment. take it & move on Do not be afraid to say NO - if it does not serve you Do not be afraid to say YES - be afraid but just say yes. try new things. explore. enjoy. stop running from daylight. get out there and spread your magic around a little  a lot Don't compare - no one, no one, no one can fulfill the purpose God has for you but you. God has your right where he wants you. keep up the good work and know that He will uplift you right on time Open yourself to love & be loved - you deserve it  Be selective about who you allow to access your energy - be mindful of the people who only come around when your on the top. cherish those who were there at your absolute worst Your happiness is just as important as anyone else's - stop trying to be everything to everyone & be everything to yourself. hype yourself. nourish yourself. encourage yourself. invest in yourself. love yourself. learn yourself. Figure out what makes you happy and do more of it I am enough - I am. I truly am. Do not underestimate yourself or your God - kick butt. share you ideas. speak your mind. know that you are amazing. trust God

November 29, 2017

Journey to Wellness

Sweater: Topshop | Bottoms: Zara | Boots: Zara





Hey guys. I think many of you follow me on instagram so you probably have somewhat of an idea that I started making vast changes to my daily routine in order to improve not only my physical health but my mental health. As I have mentioned before I have struggled with anxiety for many many years. The first encounter I can remember was in 4th grade. I had this class presentation. It probably wasn't my first but for some reason I was super nervous. I have no idea why because I was totally prepared, over prepared one would say. My presentation boards were always a hit but when it came to getting up in front of the class I would place my board on the ledge and get the talking so fast just so I could get back to my seat. This presentation was on snails and I was really excited about all the new facts that I had learned (I cant believe how vivid I remember this; I had my first crush at this time too - maybe that's why I was so nervous..hmm) and rehearsed to share while pointing at the diagram I had glued onto my board. Well as soon as I got to the front of the class and had all eyes on me I started talking at the speed of light and got my hinny back to my seat as quickly as possible. Even at this age my anxiety came with this awful pit feeling. I remember getting home from school and my mom asking how the presentation went. She had helped me, practiced with me and knew how excited I was about the facts so she asked me if I shared this fact and that fact and I was like oh no I forgot that one... but my board was pretty and they probably saw. (btw i totally aced the report, board and presentation).Well this feeling of anxiety anytime I was in the spotlight pretty much carried me into adulthood. To the point that I probably haven't had a good nights sleep in a decade because my mind won't slow down. It was all but manageable up until the last couple of years and more recently it has been so bad that I carry that pit feeling I was talking about almost the entire day. A couple weeks ago it was so bad that I started getting these sharp pains in my stomach throughout my day and realized that I had to make a change if I was going to survive to see a healthy 30. I have joked with my mom for many years that I will probably have an ulcer or stroke before my 30th birthday because of anxiety. My anxiety comes from the feeling of not being in control & fear of the unknown and it literally rules my life. It tells me whether I am going to get out of bed today, what time I'm going to get out of bed, what I'm going to do once I get out of bed, if I'm going to productive throughout my day! Finally I realized that this had to stop. I have a dream that I know God has planted in my heart to change the world and be a bold woman in Christ for my generation. I can't do any of this if I'm living in fear, allowing my anxiety to run and drain me to the point of depletion. I would wake up with less energy then I had when I went to sleep. Finally I decided to be intentional in driving the change I wanted to see in my life. You can't keep talking about this is the life I want, I see it, I know what it takes to get there but put in zero effort. 

First things first I knew I had to get to a place where I could get rest. I used to do everything in my room. Sleep, watch tv, do homework, just any and everything. But your room is for sleep and if your doing everything in your room then your body doesn't equate your room with sleep. So I do my work downstairs at the kitchen table, I do not watch tv in my room especially not within an hour or two of me going to sleep. I literally stay out of my room unless I'm going to cleaning up, getting dressed or going to sleep. I now go to bed with enough time to get at least 7 hours of rest. I also wake up at the same time everyday (even on my day off). The very latest I will sleep is 7am. Since doing this I have found that my body naturally wakes up, even before my alarm. And I get up and start my day, even if that's at 5am.
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I knew I had to get active. This literally gets me out of bed every morning. I wake up excited to get downstairs and do my 10 min abs workout and 30 minutes walk on the treadmill; I walk on the highest incline and started at 3.0 speed (i've gotten up to 3.3).  Exercise produces endorphins which are natural painkillers. Fun fact: 5 minutes of physical activity can begin to stimulate anti-anxiety effects. Exercise has also show to reduce fatigue, improve alertness/concentration and enhance cognitive function. Basically if your body feels better so does your mind and I'm here for all of that. My mental health is just as important to me as my physical health, if not more. My lack of mental wellness has held me back more than anything.
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I really had to determine what triggers my anxiety. My short list:
the unknown
feeling out of control
feeling taken advantage of
comparison (the thief of joy)

Conclusion: God is in control. Trust him.
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Be selfish with my time and energy. If something does not serve me I do not entertain it. It's about me right now. What's going to get me to the life that I want. Everyday I wake up and ask myself "What can you do today that will get you to the tomorrow you want?" It's actually the name of my morning alarm. In part the reason why I choose to be single. I would rather spend my Friday night refining a master plan than on a date with someone who may or may not be around next year. I really just don't have the energy or time to care for anyone other than myself. I also know that God is going to make it clear to me when I have met his match for me. I know he is faithful to those who are faithful to him. That's it, that's all.
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Change up my diet. Yo this has been crazy in boosting my overall mood, and energy. I was the queen of fast food. My schedule was all over the place and on days when I used to get off at midnight the only thing that's open is good ole' Taco Bell, and McDonalds. I found myself eating fast food late at night, vending machine junk while at work or not at all. For the last few months I have said a big hello to the pescatarian lifestyle. I considered trying vegan (I'm not ready) but I have cut down on dairy and implemented vegan eats in my life like coconut milk, dairy-free yogurt, dairy-free nutella, and other vegan snacks like veggie chips and organic dried mango. Last night I also bought some black bean & quinoa burgers I can't wait to try. The results have been amazing y'all. I don't feel drowsy throughout the day, I have so much energy, my overall quality of life has improved drastically, and i'm not exaggerating. I feel like a new person (this is probably coupled with my self love/care journey).
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Journal daily. I'm a writer. It's my passion. It's my calling. I stopped writing for a long time for lack of inspiration. I started writing poetry in junior high and continued throughout college (probably the last time I wrote for myself until recently). So I have a prayer journal which I write in first thing every morning, I have a self love journal so I can look back on this journey, I also have a "in spite of myself" journal where I right down the productive things I tackled everyday despite my anxiety, fear or self doubt. So ill Ill start the entry with: "in spite of my fear I". I used to  let my anxiety keep me in bed but now its a trigger. As soon as the pit feeling comes I get up and do something positive like workout, cook, write, love on myself or listen to an uplifting podcast. 
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Be careful what you watch/listen to. This is so important. What you put in comes out in your actions. I try to minimize secular music to workouts and even then I am super choosy. I won't listen to anything that will get me to think about my past, degrades woman or glorifies the fast lifestyle. Am I perfect, no. I do have days where I will play a little hip hop to get me motivated to work out. I also try to minimize my tv intake, especially before bed. TV is trash. I'm even thinking about removing the TV from my room. It's just junk, like 98% of it. This man is cheating on this woman. This girl is hating on this girl. I can't take it. I was so excited when Blackish finally came back. Right now my TV intake is Project Runway, The Bold Type and Younger. (Right now I'm fasting from TV for the rest of the year. I want to spend that time in my bible, writing, creating content, reading, cooking and enjoying the people around me. TV is just another form of comparison. It create fantasies & those fantasies create panic, at least in me, & then they bleed into my dreams and stimulate my fear and anxiety.)
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Limit social media scrolling. I am on social media multiple times throughout the day to share content but I have really limited who I keep up with. It's so easy to compare your life to peoples highlight reels. I'm sure folks think I have a perfect life, something I have struggled with since childhood (writing on this soon) and even more as adult trying to fulfill my dreams and create a life for myself. My parents have done very well for themselves and in turn I have reaped many benefits BUT that doesn't mean my life is perfect. Material things don't make me happy. Material things are a temporary fix, the adrenaline of something new is gone in a couple weeks and your problem or unhappiness is still there. That's why no one can buy me or buy my love. I'm not into it. I'd rather you give me an hour of undivided attention than give me a Chanel bag (that's just me, i'm not knocking anybody). I used to spend my entire Saturday watching everyone live it up brunching, going to the beach, chillen' with bae and it made me feel awful because I was stuck at work until midnight. I had to unfollow a lot of my favorite bloggers, influencers and celebrities for this. Now on Saturdays I don't scroll at all and I recently turned my data off for all my social media platforms so that I can only use it on wifi. This has literally been a life saver. (Back in October I was unexpectedly asked to transfer to a new location within my company and now work Saturday mornings and off Sundays; God really came thru on this one, but I still try to limit my social media scrolling and I'm really considering deleting the app from my phone for a few weeks when I return from vacation (celebrating my birthday/holiday in Mexico). Social media has a way of being in the way if you don't watch yourself! 

So what routines have you all put in place improve your mental/physical health and live your best life? xo

November 22, 2017

SMILE

Sweatshirt: H&M / Skirt: Topshop / Boots: Zara





One of the reasons I write my prayers down is so it is tangible, and I am able to look back and see the growth,  month by month, year by year. I just started in my fifth journal on the 12th so today I took a moment to read the first prayer I journaled, written on April 1st. I want to share a little excerpt with you "Lord, I am really struggling to make sense of my life right now. I know that this individual was put in my life for a purpose but I also know that I made this person a priority above everyone and everything, including you. Help me to focus on growing as a person, spiritually and on my goals. I am also hurting with thoughts that after all my energy given that I was not worth setting childish things aside and showing me appreciation. I know that there is someone that you have for me, please help me to focus on that and preparing myself for when you introduce us instead of dwelling on my past. Please give me discernment as far of pursuing friendship with this individual. Allow me to take responsibility for my disobedience to you. Give me the strength not to allow my emotions to drive me back into the same situation. Draw me close to you when I am sad. Remind me that you are with me. Deliver me from my fear of being alone and not making anything of my life. Remind me that you have a plan. Encourage me and allow me to see the lesson in this season of singleness. Prepare me for what is next. Teach me to stand in my truth, speak up and communicate how I feel to those around me. Deliver me from my obsession with TV. Lead me to your word and not social media when I am feeling lonely and depressed. Remind me that you know what is best for me. Keep my eyes stayed on you so that I will not dwell on my circumstance. Teach me how to leave my burdens with you." 

Now this is the prayer I jotted down before bed on Nov 17th: "  Thank you for bringing me back to gratitude. I can see that I had a successful year kicking and screaming. Lord I put my goals and dreams in your hands. I know that you are on top of it. I know that when you see fit you will give me the desires of my heart as they align with your will. Lord I know that you are preparing me for what is to come in my next season. I thank you for everything that came my way. I have learned patience, strength like never before. I have learned how to lean on  you. Thank you for trusting me with the trials that have grown me up. I thank you that I have learned to accept myself for who I am and who you say I am. I thank you that you have shown me purpose in my writing. I ask for your continued guidance and wisdom as I continue to walk as your lead and do not move ahead of you. That I will recognize your voice above my own emotions and feeling. I pray that i will focus on my own goals and not compare my year one with others year 10. I am right where I am supposed to be and right where you would have me to be. Nothing that has happened to me was an accident. It was all for a purpose to grow me, to give me purpose, to heal me and those who you put before me and to draw me into a closer relationship with you. You are so faithful. I thank you for the foundation you are laying in my life. I know that you and you alone can heal my heart of the hurts of my past. I recognize that rejection was for my protection and I thank you. I thank you for shutting doors while not allowing others to open. I know that you know best and have my best interest. Clear my mind. Clear the clutter in my brain. Teach me how to let the day go. I relinquish today. Today came and I kicked butt and now I let go of the coulda, shoulda, woulda's. I will not dwell on or focus on the days ahead. I will stay present right here right now knowing that you are in control and are working it all out. You have given me everything I need to be successful even on my worst days. I trust you and I trust your plan and I know that my future is bright with you leading the way. I love you. Thank you for never giving up on me,  for forgiving me, and restoring me, for removing my sin far from me. I pray that I will be intentional about guarding my heart. That I will be careful about what I allow into my eyes & ears. That I will not participate in mindless banter or unhealthy activities. That I will be choosy about who I allow to walk into this new season with me. Give me the courage to walk away, to say no, to say yes, to be okay when others reject me. To be patient as I await the king you created just for me. That I will be prepared for him. That my heart will be healed for him. That I will be ready to walk in obedience with him as we deny ourselves to glorify you. I pray that he will lead me in your word. That we will both understand our union is to glorify you and that we will be a force in your kingdom. " All I have to say is that God answers prayers. I wrote that first prayer earlier this year in anguish, fear, desperation. In the latter written a couple days ago I have truly accepted that God is in control. That I can trust His plan, His will and His best for my life. I truly thank God for the pain I endured this year because it has brought me closer to Him, driven me to pursue my writing as a means of healing/helping others, be a better woman than I was yesterday, grow up & glow up!! I've never been this excited to walk into a new year. I've never been so excited about turning another year older (Christmas Eve). I feel the tide changing in my life because I am allowing God to lead the way. I know He got me like no one else does. Through Him alone have I let go of the resentment that lived in my heart. In Him I know that I have purpose & a future doing what I love with someone that I love & loves me just the same (if not more).

November 16, 2017

DEM GOALS








Do y'all mind if I brag on myself a little bit? Self acceptance, love, care and awareness were kind of the trending topics for woman in the african american community this year. Personally I'm not a go with the trend of the moment kinda girl but I'm so glad that I got on board. It was empowering and encouraging to see woman of color stand for themselves and say no more. No more taking care of everyone and everything other than myself. No more putting off my dreams. No more standing in the shadows. No more shooting for anything other than the stars. We got woke this year & realized we bomb. & that's true whether we knee deep in our dream career or just starting, in a relationship or single, living in our dream home/apt/living at home, etc. We winning because even with all the garbage thrown at us we always manage to pick ourselves up, dust ourselves off & continue to glow. Maybe it's just me but I feel hella magical!! I'm ready to leave a trail of glitter wherever this next year takes me and I know it's going to be good because my God is leading the way!!!!

So earlier this week I was looking thru the notes in my phone and stumbled across a list of goals I made for 2017 sometime back in April when I decided to re-evaluate my life and be more intentional about my spiritual, mental, financial and career growth. To be honest I made the list to help me get on track but I haven't thought much of it since. Hence, I opened it with hesitation. The first goal listed under spiritual- put God first: I have clung to God this year like my life depended on it; well because it does, journal everyday: I filled 4 journals, overcome anxiety: Not only have I learned how to successfully manage my anxiety but also my depression & stress. 3 wins. So I moved on to the next category; finance- 715 credit score, it's 705 as of this week; major win, independence: well I gave my folks their credit card back and started living within my means and I took my car to the auto shop for the first time without my dad so yeah (this is a big deal if you know me),  pay off debts: I paid off my personal credit card & plan to pay off car/school debt by 2019, two wins I did not have: save $10,000 & buy a home - set for 2018. On to personal- learn more about self: the win I'm most proud of, open self to being more social: well I definitely stepped out of my comfort zone more than usual this year, be thankful for this season: yep (rejection is protection my friends) & God knows what you are and are not ready for so be intentional, and wait on Him, learn to cook- now one of my favorite things to do, read 12 books: I read 7. My non wins: watch less reality tv; I have decided to fast from TV for the remainder of the year & I am missing the season finale of Project Runway as I type this -_-, also cleanliness is something I definitely need to work on in the new year, I'm domestic but not really domestic, if that makes sense, lol. Lastly is career- blog 3/week: I updated 1/month (plan to post 1/week in both nov/dec to set the tone for the upcoming year, 25k views on site: hit 20k last week & I managed to inspire 7k with my content on social media. Non wins: natural hair ambassador: I want to see more naturals with undefined curls in print, take real estate classes: signing up for January 2018, flip a house: stay tuned in 2018.

I remember thinking if I made it half way through this list that I was a bad mamma jamma. I think God returned me to this list to bring me back to gratitude. All I can do is thank Him for guiding my steps & allowing me to see a successful year even as I kicked and screamed when he shut doors that I wanted open. Every year since I graduated college I have said "that year" was going to be "my year" and truly this year was mine. Little wins add up. My biggest win: making it a point to love my actual life while fighting intentionally for the one I want. Word to the wise: Be intention, put forth the effort and trust God!! He will not let you down!


there is nothing that can be a substitute for experience