August 19, 2017

STRONGER TOGETHER


Jacket: thrifted | Skirt: H&M  | Shoes: Zara
Is anyone else fed up at how the media capitalizes off women (especially African American woman) refusing to support each other? I sure am. I just don't quite get it. Why do we feel so threatened by each other? And more importantly why do we give our attention to such nonsense? That's why the bible says to guard your heart and mind. Reality tv (which is obviously staged) now speaks true to this generation on how we "should" interact with one another. I used to live and breath reality tv until one day I realized that I was developing a spirit of lust, discontent and materialism. I started hating myself because I didn't have this success or this love, or this portrayal of beauty. Honestly reality tv is a legal form of prostitution (defined as: the unworthy or corrupt use of one's talents for the sake of personal or financial gain). Your pimp (producer) asks you to do this for the tv audience (client) in exchange for money. All these woman are slaves to fame/power making them reckless and unfortunately these are the role models our children are looking up to because it "appears" that they have it all. What also concerns me is the lack of support for one another. I just be asking myself like why does another woman's beauty threaten your beauty, or her talent/success take away from yours? It doesn't! So why can't we come together to support, encourage and challenge each other so that we can take over the world as a unit. We were all were created to give something to this life. If me and you share a vision why can't we sit across from one another and bounce ideas rather than throw drinks,  and insults? As creatives we need one another to stay motivated, or maybe that's just me. I feel most motivated and inspired after talking to my fellow sisters who are also striving/struggling/thriving in pursuit of their purpose. It gets me excited. I really want to see my woman rise above society teaching us that we have to be at war with one another. Im trying to tell y'all, they want us to be at war with each other so we won't win. We are more of a threat when we are holding hands, just saying. It is hard enough being a woman in this world, not to add a woman of color. We are at war with our men, our employers, and the culture, we do not have to be at war with each other. Lets embrace and uplift one another. Lets come together and change the narrative. We are stronger together!!! I truly believe that. I created this blog to connect with my love of fashion but it is evolving more into a place where I connect with with my sisters in attempt to create a new normal- embrace ourselves, each other, our talents and waiting seasons. I don't want to hear another man use words like weak, damaged, insecure, reckless, victim, bitter or difficult to describe one of my sisters because I know it isn't true. We are strong, we are beautiful, we are gentle, we are foundations, we are life givers, we are survivors, we are one of a kind, we are thrivers, we are magic. Sisters, we have to be the narrators of our own stories. We have to stop letting the media, the culture and men speak for us. We have to let our actions speak for us. And we can only do this together. 

If you don't want to be weak,  know what you deserve and demand it (do not ask)

If you don't want to be a victim,  leave... (point blank period and that goes for relationships/careers/friendships). Stop putting your energy into things that don't serve you. 

If you don't want to be damaged, stop focusing on your failures (make defeat your fuel)

If you don't want to be insecure, love on yourself  (and not that surface "i'm a bad bih" love) Everyone can see thru that. Dig deep. 

If you don't want to be bitter, let it be a lesson so that you do not repeat

If you don't want to be reckless,  do not let greed/power/fame be your motivation (you will sell yourself short and toss your morals to the wind to get it)

If you want to be a queen, you decide your worth (not your relationship, your job, what kind of car you drive, house you live in, etc) Check for you worth inwardly!!

...And if we want the world (and our men) to respect us then we have to respect one another!

August 11, 2017

BEING INTENTIONAL

Top: Forever 21 | Pants: Topshop | Shoes: Zara | Scarf: thrift







I've been super uninspired lately. I'm probably just overthinking. I want this blog to be a place of inspiration/motivation for woman but I charge myself with perfection in my writing and transparency. It's super funny because this is the exact reason why I didn't pursue a career in journalism. I never wanted to loose my passion to write in "having to do it", if that makes sense. I picked up writing back when I was in [what] junior high school. I used to write little stupid poems about the popular boy I liked or whatever. Then I started writing more after my "first love" ended in what I thought at the time was the worst of ways. For me writing is always easier when I'm (for lack of a better word) sad or things aren't exactly working out the way I want. Is that weird? Can anyone else relate? Well either way I like to do it in my own time when my thoughts are natural & free flowing. I never want to feel like I am forcing it or forcing a narrative but what I do want is to make sure that I'm putting a positive spin on whatever it is I'm writing. The issue that I am running into is that life doesn't always work like that. And I can't always wrap my experiences up in a nice little bow. There are days when I am super excited about my journey and others when I don't even want to get out my bed to face the day. This week has been a lot of the latter and I am still trying to figure out why. It's like I wake up in a pit and can't turn it around. What I do know is that staying in bed won't help me get any closer to the life that I want. So I'm trying really hard to be intentional in my efforts. If I want to be the best version of myself I have to be intentional about being that person. If I want meaningful relationships I have to be intentional about improving my connections. So even though I find myself not wanting to jump out the bed and greet the day I am intentional about doing so. Right now working out is my something to look forward to when I wake up. This week it has been the thing that gets me out of bed. So that's a start. Working out is also known to help with anxiety, stress, and insomnia. I've seen improvement in all of these areas this week. "Free the endorphins" lol. I think another realization I have come to this week is that I don't use my time wisely. If I can't be wise with what I have now how can God trust me with more? Most people relate that to finances but for me it also goes for my time. Would I love to be in full-time business for myself of course but if I don't use the free time I have now to focus on my career pursuits then how can he trust me with 24hrs/365 of free-time? So when I start making the best of my time I know that God will make a way for me to have more. For this reason I am up forcing my hand this morning! Gotta start somewhere. So I end this week with productivity. I woke up in a pit; I worked out, made some breakfast and (being intentional) instead of going to my room to eat and fool myself into thinking I can get work done in bed I brought my computer downstairs into a main area in the crib and voila; a new post. What are some ways you guys break free of your pits? Is it by finding that thing you can look forward to each day? xo