November 16, 2017

DEM GOALS








Do y'all mind if I brag on myself a little bit? Self acceptance, love, care and awareness were kind of the trending topics for woman in the african american community this year. Personally I'm not a go with the trend of the moment kinda girl but I'm so glad that I got on board. It was empowering and encouraging to see woman of color stand for themselves and say no more. No more taking care of everyone and everything other than myself. No more putting off my dreams. No more standing in the shadows. No more shooting for anything other than the stars. We got woke this year & realized we bomb. & that's true whether we knee deep in our dream career or just starting, in a relationship or single, living in our dream home/apt/living at home, etc. We winning because even with all the garbage thrown at us we always manage to pick ourselves up, dust ourselves off & continue to glow. Maybe it's just me but I feel hella magical!! I'm ready to leave a trail of glitter wherever this next year takes me and I know it's going to be good because my God is leading the way!!!!

So earlier this week I was looking thru the notes in my phone and stumbled across a list of goals I made for 2017 sometime back in April when I decided to re-evaluate my life and be more intentional about my spiritual, mental, financial and career growth. To be honest I made the list to help me get on track but I haven't thought much of it since. Hence, I opened it with hesitation. The first goal listed under spiritual- put God first: I have clung to God this year like my life depended on it; well because it does, journal everyday: I filled 4 journals, overcome anxiety: Not only have I learned how to successfully manage my anxiety but also my depression & stress. 3 wins. So I moved on to the next category; finance- 715 credit score, it's 705 as of this week; major win, independence: well I gave my folks their credit card back and started living within my means and I took my car to the auto shop for the first time without my dad so yeah (this is a big deal if you know me),  pay off debts: I paid off my personal credit card & plan to pay off car/school debt by 2019, two wins I did not have: save $10,000 & buy a home - set for 2018. On to personal- learn more about self: the win I'm most proud of, open self to being more social: well I definitely stepped out of my comfort zone more than usual this year, be thankful for this season: yep (rejection is protection my friends) & God knows what you are and are not ready for so be intentional, and wait on Him, learn to cook- now one of my favorite things to do, read 12 books: I read 7. My non wins: watch less reality tv; I have decided to fast from TV for the remainder of the year & I am missing the season finale of Project Runway as I type this -_-, also cleanliness is something I definitely need to work on in the new year, I'm domestic but not really domestic, if that makes sense, lol. Lastly is career- blog 3/week: I updated 1/month (plan to post 1/week in both nov/dec to set the tone for the upcoming year, 25k views on site: hit 20k last week & I managed to inspire 7k with my content on social media. Non wins: natural hair ambassador: I want to see more naturals with undefined curls in print, take real estate classes: signing up for January 2018, flip a house: stay tuned in 2018.

I remember thinking if I made it half way through this list that I was a bad mamma jamma. I think God returned me to this list to bring me back to gratitude. All I can do is thank Him for guiding my steps & allowing me to see a successful year even as I kicked and screamed when he shut doors that I wanted open. Every year since I graduated college I have said "that year" was going to be "my year" and truly this year was mine. Little wins add up. My biggest win: making it a point to love my actual life while fighting intentionally for the one I want. Word to the wise: Be intention, put forth the effort and trust God!! He will not let you down!


there is nothing that can be a substitute for experience


November 9, 2017

LETTER TO MY TEENAGE SELF


Inspired by Black Girl In Om podcast #25. Great are the things I wish I could tell 16 year old Alexia. My journey has been quite a journey but I accept (even embrace) my mistakes/failures as lessons. It has lead me to this very moment. I'm truly thankful that today I am living in my purpose, being intentional and becoming the very best version of myself But every once in a while 29 year-old Alexia needs the same push 16 year old Alexia did. 

Dear Alexia,
You are beautiful. Your heart is beautiful. Your flaws are beautiful. God was intentional when he made you. There ain't a person on this Earth quite like you. Do you hear me? You are one of a kind. You are unique. You are quirky. Do not change. Embrace it. Embrace your flaws. Embrace your weaknesses. Accept your weakness. Make them work for you. Don't let words change who you are. You were meant to be you. Only you. You are awkward and that is okay. Being awkward isn't the worse thing in the world. Not even close. You were not made to fit in.  You were made to be light. You are a healer. You will change lives. And you should never be afraid to stand out. Brush opinions off, they do not serve you. Approve of your damn self. You are perfectly imperfect. You are loved. Don't hide. Don't be timid. Walk in confidence. You are enough. Approach things head on. Do not stand in the shadows. Let the sun shine on your face. Your words are important. Use them wisely. But USE THEM. Speak up. Be bold. Have balls. Take charge of your life. Only you can accomplish God's will for your life. No one else. You have everything it takes to accomplish anything you want. You are an artist. Don't deny it. Don't suppress it. Let fear drive and not cripple you. Just go for it. You are incredible. Trust yourself. Follow your instincts. Chase your dreams. Do not procrastinate. Love abundantly. It will be your greatest teacher. Love your damn self. *repeat last line * Surround yourself with people who believe in you, uplift and challenge you. Don't doubt yourself. To hell with doubt. Be intentional. Be present. Be grateful. Buck up. Your were chosen for this journey. It will be tough but worth it. Know that you are going to make mistakes but you are not your mistakes.  You are not your failures. You failures are not an indication of your future. Don't take yourself for granted. Don't worry about looking stupid. Don't worry about failing. You are gonna fail. But you are going to pick yourself up. You are going to thrive. You are going to grow. Your successes will be greater than your failures. Look people in the eyes. Mean what you say. Say what is on your heart. Don't water it down. Don't chase people. Don't dull your light.  Don't sensor yourself. Be who you are and those that are meant for you will come and stay. Leave an impression. Demand what you deserve. Leave if you need to. Trust actions over words. Don't accept bullsh*t. Know your worth. Know that you are worthy. Never, EVER, EVER compare yourself to others!!!!! There is really no comparison. Be content in your season and with your portion. Wait on God. When I say wait I don't mean be idle I mean put forth the effort and trust God for the results. Oh and do not settle. Do not waste time on basic things. You were meant for greatness. Accept the responsibility. Forgive. Do not hold onto things. You are going to get thru "this", whatever "this" may be. It's not as serious as it seems right now. Go with your gut and stop overthinking and talking yourself out of things. Dream big. And dream bigger. I love you. xx