December 13, 2017


Hat: BP \ Sunnies: Quay \ Top: H&M \ Bottoms: Forever21 \ Jacket: Zara kids

December 6, 2017


Frames: Quay |  Sweater, Pants, Bag: Zara

This weekend I sat down with a friend that I pretty much grew up. I love getting together with individuals who knew me way back when. We can laugh about the stupidity of our youth and celebrate the growth. This individual has known me longer than anyone, besides family of course. We met when we were 17 years old. Our early years were not pretty. But we were kids and kids do dumb things, that we look back on as adults and just laugh. We took a couple years off here and there but we have always been there for each other during the worst; break ups, loosing a parent, sucky jobs, etc. During our meet up this friend who has seen me through a lot told me that he saw a happiness in me that he has never seen before. What a confirmation from God that all the things that tried me this year were on purpose for a purpose! There is a new glow about me. Hallelujah!! We tend to put emphasis on the wrong things. We tend to worry about the wrong things. A huge wake up for me this year was putting everything into perspective. The things that I cried over or worried about 10 years ago, or even 5 years ago don't even matter to me now. So whenever I am experiencing something I "think" I can't bare I bring it into perspective, "Will this even matter in 5 years?" and usually the answer is no. Only a handful of people know that back in April I lost someone who held a significant space in my heart. I was devastated. Ready to give up on myself, on life, on progress. I pretty much held up in bed, cried everywhere no one was looking, felt like I was dying (told you I'm dramatic) for like three months until God stepped in. The moment I redirected my pain into passion things started to look up. Does this individual still hold a place in my heart? Of course. Do I realize that he served his purpose in my life and vice versa and it was time for us to both move on and grow apart? Absolutely! Little by little, day by day I moved on and stopped wallowing in the hurt of it all. I accepted that God used me to hold him up during the toughest year of his life & God used him to draw me back to Him, my purpose and myself. So one thing I know to be true is that God will never remove you from a situation to put you in one less than. He is faithful. So 7 months later I am thriving and so is he. In two short weeks I turn 29 and I can truly say that I lived this year on purpose. At last my 20's are coming to an end and I plan to lay a foundation for continued growth. As for anything this next year tries to throw at me, I got over this mountain so bring it on. I am ready to create, learn myself, treat myself, step into the spotlight, go places, nourish my friendships and just do more of what I love. So here are some of the lessons that truly enriched my life:

Forgive - do not allow bitterness to store in your heart for those who mistreat you Accept what you cannot control - let it go Set time aside for yourself - get to know yourself, what do you like? what don't you like? when are you the happiest? go on a solo date. read a book. cook dinner. take a yoga class.  Speak up - your opinions/feelings matter.  Don't chase - the people who are truly meant for you will make the time.  You can't expect others to love you when you don't - self love is the most rewarding gift you can give yourself. truly what you you believe about yourself on the inside will exude on the outside. people can tell when your reaching for love as validation or worth. it's not attractive. and no man can validate you like Jesus can The love you want is inside of you - do you want to spend the rest of your life with yourself? then why should he? Be patient - wait on God. His timing is perfect Don't sacrifice yourself to be perfect for others - no one is perfect. those who love you won't hold your flaws against you. Stop trying to hold open doors that God closed on purpose - that relationship, friendship, job, etc that He knows may seem good but isn't His best!  Rejection is protection - God allowed that person that takes but doesn't replenish to walk out of your life. God blocked you from getting that job that's going to steal your peace and keep you from pursuing your true destiny. God removed that friend that sucks the life and brings out the worst in you. He out here trying to help you dodge a bullet and you steady fighting it. Stop it. He has better for you if you just wait Your past is not an indication of your future - there is always a teachable moment. take it & move on Do not be afraid to say NO - if it does not serve you Do not be afraid to say YES - be afraid but just say yes. try new things. explore. enjoy. stop running from daylight. get out there and spread your magic around a little  a lot Don't compare - no one, no one, no one can fulfill the purpose God has for you but you. God has your right where he wants you. keep up the good work and know that He will uplift you right on time Open yourself to love & be loved - you deserve it  Be selective about who you allow to access your energy - be mindful of the people who only come around when your on the top. cherish those who were there at your absolute worst Your happiness is just as important as anyone else's - stop trying to be everything to everyone & be everything to yourself. hype yourself. nourish yourself. encourage yourself. invest in yourself. love yourself. learn yourself. Figure out what makes you happy and do more of it I am enough - I am. I truly am. Do not underestimate yourself or your God - kick butt. share you ideas. speak your mind. know that you are amazing. trust God